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instrumental needs lyrics


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#1 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 03:51 PM

i recorded a quick instrumental jam today :smilinguitar: ....i thought it would work well with vocals
was going to post and see if there was any feedback...........then i tried a lyric that Johnny (Hearinvoices) posted a while back....thought it would work....

i'll post the instrumental and the idea with Johnny's lyrics......


instrumentalAttached File  instrumental jam.mp3   4.38MB   7 downloads



with vocalsAttached File  man in the shadows jam.mp3   4.41MB   24 downloads


the guitar tracked left needs simplified to go with vocals......i just quickly sang over the instrumental track.....also needs a chorus added.....etc....




Paul............

#2 OFFLINE   Briandb1222

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 04:03 PM

I feel a rap song coming along! And I do like the vocals...maybe you should try to turn your songs in to producers to see if you become a hit!

#3 OFFLINE   hearinvoices

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 05:17 PM

Nice one Paul. Those lyrics work pretty good with your tune . I"m really liking the feel too ...... good groove ! Did you plan on using some of the lyrics for a chorus or do you need more ?



Johnny
Sometimes I sit and think and sometimes I just sit . Mostly I just sit ..... I think

#4 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 05:40 PM

cheers Brian and Johnny :winkthumb:

needs a bit of work and needs a change for the chorus....think of a chorus coming in pretty much where it ends
was thinkin of using the lyrics you had for a chorus Johnny.....could maybe use another verse tho...i forget how much is on the other post.......i'm goin to go and check.......


Paul......

#5 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 05:47 PM

got the lyrics from the other post


edited how i see them fitting this idea

Spent half my life just tryin to survive and the other half killin myself
never having more than the day before, putting my life on the shelf
been running trying to stay ahead of the dark, but I just can't find the light
just when I think I'm almost there, day turns into night

hey good to see you come on in, welcome to my show

Been drifting around these empty streets, never staying anywhere too long
been wanting make everything alright, but the darkness swallows my tongue
tired of living with this pain inside, knowing that I was wrong
but no one sees a man in the shadows, there's nowhere I belong

Hey good to see you come on in, welcome to my show

(chorus)
Can you see me .. I'm the man in the shadows
can you hear me .. I'm the whisper in the dark
I've been gone way too long my friend
and feel I'm never coming back again
I'm the man in the shadows ...just a man in the shadows


another verse and chorus maybe



Paul...............

#6 OFFLINE   eddiez152

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 07:57 PM

That came out well.
Nothin sweeter than the sound of music comin out of a 6 string box - EZ me Music / ASCAP "Music is a social act of communication, a gesture of friendship,the strongest there is"-Malcolm Arnold

#7 OFFLINE   hearinvoices

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 08:12 PM

I was listening to this again and I'm really liking the music to this ! With a little finish and polish this one could really shine ! I will work on another verse for you and see what I can come up with. I was listening to it again and I was wondering ...... I like the way you start the vocals off at about :37 with that deeper voice and I was wondering what if repeated the same lines with that same tone at about 1:11 right after welcome to my show ? I like the way that adds a little different flavor to it. Just a thought :dunno:


Take care bud , talk to ya soon,


Johnny
Sometimes I sit and think and sometimes I just sit . Mostly I just sit ..... I think

#8 OFFLINE   hearinvoices

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Posted 04 February 2011 - 09:55 AM

Okay Paul dont know if these lines will work but maybe something to off of for another verse

this world is full of abandon roads, they always seem to call on me
where lost and broken souls , wander 'round aimlessly

i stay in the shadows behind the light , so no one else can see

the pain of the choices that have brought me here, and my insecurities



Just some ideas , see what u think ?





Johnny
Sometimes I sit and think and sometimes I just sit . Mostly I just sit ..... I think

#9 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 04 February 2011 - 12:02 PM

yeah i like the ideas :winkthumb: .......was thinkin the same about the 1:11 part.....would need to be a backin vocal because of the timing, it just about overlaps the "welcome to my show" not a problem tho

i was thinking if we do that "can you see me i'm the man in the shadows, i'm the whisper in the dark"....before each verse
and after the last verse, before the chorus.....not got the music worked out for chorus yet....it'll be something nice n simple....i was thinking one chorus would work on this idea.....maybe do the two verses like we have, then a wee instrumental verse, third verse with new lyrics then chorus and instrumental to finish :dunno:


will try and work on the chorus...see what happens...lol


Paul......

#10 OFFLINE   carol m

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 02:55 AM

It's looking good guys - nice writing Johnny, and we all know Paul is a master at putting words to music. :winkthumb:
One good thing about music is that when it hits you, you feel no pain - Bob Marley

#11 OFFLINE   starsailor

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 05:49 AM

This is coming together well Paul and Johnny, nice writing and arranging, sounds great :winkthumb:
You don't stop laughing when you grow old; you grow old when you stop laughing.

#12 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 11:15 AM

cheers Carol and Chris :winkthumb:

this may be a hard one to re record and keep the feeling.....it's a simple enough blues progression A A D A E D A ...i think
i recorded the bassline first at night, the guitars the next day, then quickly added the vocals.....the music was just improvised and i never had any real expectations, but now i have an idea of how it should sound it will make the recording process a bit tricky.....to capture the original feel....
i may get a chance to start later today/tonight.......we shall see how it goes :guitarguy: ....lol

i like the way Johnny's lyrics work with this......it's been a while since i recorded this way...music first then adding lyrics, i've been doing it lyrics first then finding the music to fit for a while now.....it's good to work both ways tho...



Paul...........

#13 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 04:41 PM

had a wee go at adding extra verse and chorus to the original recording......copied the bass and rhythm guitar parts and left the 8 bars or so for the chorus - nothing fancy think it's D A D A G D A....i think actually the verse is Am and Dm not sure as the song is more riff based, and i don't always know what key/scale or particular chord names i'm using......i don't tend to worry about it - anyway, i then dropped in a chorus part for the rhythm guitar and bass, then re-recorded the full lead guitar track(tracked left) then recorded the vocals for third verse and chorus......this is just to see if chorus and structure work......then i'll re-record the whole song :guitardude:



a few mistakes and some gain issues on the vocals....Attached File  man in the shadows jam take 2.mp3   10.33MB   2 downloads



the melody needs tweaked on the chorus but i wanted to hear how the chord change would work, i had another idea of just playing the same chord progression(as the verse) with a change of riff or something.....see what y'all think of this tho



Paul..............



Paul...........

#14 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 05 February 2011 - 09:10 PM

jammed with the guitar on this again.....redone both lead guitars.....really tweaking what the left guitar plays along with the vocals....not too worried about the lead breaks at this point






Attached File  man in the shadows jam take 3.mp3   10.27MB   40 downloads







Paul..........

#15 OFFLINE   starsailor

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Posted 06 February 2011 - 08:13 AM

Sounds good here Paul, it's catchy too, love these lyrics, "Spent half my life trying to survive and the other half killing myself" great line, played this to the Family, thumbs up from them too. :winkthumb:
You don't stop laughing when you grow old; you grow old when you stop laughing.

#16 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 06 February 2011 - 05:19 PM

cheers chris :winkthumb: ........aye 4 sure Johnny's lyrics are quality

#17 OFFLINE   hearinvoices

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Posted 06 February 2011 - 06:50 PM

Great job Paul ! This has a real good groove to it ! You sure can make that guitar sing ! :leadguitar: I can't quit listening to it !



Johnny
Sometimes I sit and think and sometimes I just sit . Mostly I just sit ..... I think

#18 OFFLINE   sheraton

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 08:59 AM

hey Johnny......was thinking maybe a wee bit wah on the guitar just where the backin vox sings "can you see me i'm the man in the shadows, i'm the whisper in the dark".....if i get the chance i'll record it....see how it sounds.





Paul...........

#19 OFFLINE   hearinvoices

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 10:12 AM

Yea that may sound pretty good .... give it a shot and lets see. This is turning out to be one of my favorite ones you have done.


Johnny
Sometimes I sit and think and sometimes I just sit . Mostly I just sit ..... I think

#20 OFFLINE   Briandb1222

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Posted 07 February 2011 - 05:08 PM

The smiley is going to break them strings...maybe it even needs to tube up...anyways, love
This song, great job to both of ya!





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