Hi, everyone is giving you great advice, it's all about removing tension....
One useful way to visualize this is to think about the similarities between playing guitar and playing a sport you know well. Living in New Jersey, maybe hockey? If not, any sport will work... Imagine doing a good wrist-shot - notice how your whole body is relaxed, and you can generate plenty of speed without shooting hard. If you tense your whole body, notice how you lose speed and accuracy? Same with tennis, baseball, running, swimming, snooker, anything you can think of.
With guitar this is even more important, because the movements are so small and accurate. I would simply practice whatever you are picking, but focusing on being smooth, relaxed, and efficient. Remember to breathe, and let the pick do the work, you don't need to (or want to) hit the strings hard.
Hope this helps,
James