[carol m]

This is an experiment that was born in the Songwriting forum. It's my first effort at multi-tracking, and it was a steep learning curve. You can hear some of the edits and word flubs/slurs, but it was surprisingly difficult to get all the words out and keep in time. I believe there is a 5 beat bar as well! The phony American accent will make you laugh, but it helped me get into the style...you'll hear what I mean The last line wasn't a serious ending originally, and then I got to like it, and left it in anyway.....

[X4StringDrive]

Wow Carol...that was fantastic, with some great lyrics as well...Very well done

[hermanli_ibanezshredder]

Sounds kinda like a rap. But I won't hate this one, I hate rap but this is ok. I like the ambiance

Sounds just like the song for me. I could certainly relate to it more than the usual hard and heavy stuff.

I wanna write something heavy though.

[eddiez152]

Lovely voice behind those notes. Great job. Congrats, on your first take.

[carol m]

Thanks Jessica, if you write something heavy, I'm sure that would be interesting. At least you have a genuine accent which would help.

Thanks Kenny, as you are the prince of cut and paste, I had a good role model.

Eddie, you're ability to tell fibs is admirable...lovely voice??? Sadly you have no idea! But thanks anyway, I need a few little white lies in the vocal department. Why do you think my first attempt did not include singing??!!

[eddiez152]

Carol m
I was a boy scout, and we promise never to tell a lie.
Remember rap tunes do not require singing. But one of these days you will, I'm sure.

[tomg123]

I think you did a fine job mixing the tracks and fitting your vocals into it. I agree with eddie that the vocals were good, they were spoken but flowed nicely

[carol m]

Thanks Tom

I found a useful site at The Freesound Project :: Index

[hermanli_ibanezshredder]

Just noticed the song title was one of my favorite initials of all times. R.G.

[carol m]

Ok Jessica, you'll have to tell me - RG? Reg Gaznier is all I can think of and I'm sure its not that!

[windsong]

creative lyrics, fear would seem to come across a persons mind while listening to the lyrics

[carol m]

Thanks windsong - I didn't mean to scare you

[starsailor]

That's a work of art Carol, great lyrics, and you really created an atmosphere with the music and the effects were spot on, love the old heartbeat nice touch, the tune set the tone perfectly as well and the vocal just nailed it, I just really like it, good production, great example of creativity and originality, a brilliant debut

[knight46]

Carol,
That was great...good strong lyrics, great job using music to accentuate the lyrics. Your voice has a really nice timbre and matched the lyrics and music perfectly. Good job.

[Ian McAllister]

This is not what I expected! I think it's wonderful, the lyrics are great, really great; 'she's only half-grown, but she has her own phone', and the lines leading up to the bedroom mirror...simply brilliant. The last line is fine, it's ambiguous, not corny, keep it.
I like Laurie Anderson, and I hope you don't mind me mentioning her in comparison.
I'm a beginner at multitrack recording too, and I can only say that you've produced a great piece of music, that only needs a little polishing to finish it off satisfactorily.
Absolutely fantastic. No Smilies, too impressed.
Ian