I think it has lots of potential. It probably is about losing a love.
For what it's worth. The first line,verse 1, is past tense and the rest is present tense. The last line of the verse is a little awkward and suggests a finality that isn't reflected in the rest of the song. I think the song would work better all in past tense but, that's just me.
Third line,verse 1. The candle blown out implies the light is gone so Verse two would have to be past tense "She was the Light"
I think the chorus could be reworked for more focus." and will wait for my life" Waiting for what? It seems to be an unfinished thought. You have used the word light in every verse and chorus. Think about replacing some of them with other metaphors. Ie. "I wait for tomorrow" and long for the dawn.
This has the makings of a good tune with a little polishing. Good luck with it.
|